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Session 4 The Last 3 Obstacles: Identity, Beliefs, and Biases • The next obstacle: Identity 1. Identity is our idea about who "I" am 2. We live our life trying to be consistent with our ideas of ourselves. 3. We look for reasons why we're screwed up, but these explanations often "turn over" and become justifications for why we can't behave in any other way. 4. Once we think "I can't do that" we no longer consider the possibility that we can... and that limits us. 5. Challenge the thoughts "I can't" or "I shouldn't" with "What prevents us?" and "What would happen if we did?" 6. Redefine yourself as a Leader. A Leader is an identity. • Another obstacle: Our Beliefs About Cause & Effect 1. As a leader, you'll need to show people a pathway from here to where you want to go... and you'll need to overcome other people's beliefs that we can't get there. 2. A limiting belief is any rationalization, justification, or excuse for failure. 3. Henry Ford: "Whether you think you can or can't, you're usually right." 4. Are you a victim of your past, or are you capable of overcoming what has happened to you? 5. Some of the most successful people in the world had the hardest lives growing up, and because they had the opportunity to overcome such hard times, they developed the psychic muscles and resolve they needed to go on to massive success. • The last obstacle: Cognitive Biases 1. These are places in the mind where we're biased in one direction or another. There are many - here are two: 2. Emotional Estimation a. Emotions make negative outcomes seem scarier and more important to avoid than they really are. b. Emotions make positive outcomes seem better and less risky than they really are. 3. Seeing Only Validation a. When we have an idea of how things are, we tend to only see evidence that validates it and unconsciously ignore evidence that invalidates it. b. One solution to avoid this emotional "contamination" is to ask yourself, "What is the logical thing to do in this situation?" • 3 Paradigms For Living Into the Future: 1. Reliving The Past - Most people take their past and put it into their future. 2. Growth: Incrementally growing to the next level. 3. Creating the future you want in your mind, free of limitations. a. If you start in your mind with where you are now, you'll never get there, because there's no obvious path. b. Instead, start with where you want to go, and work backwards to where you are now. It helps free your mind. • Leadership is about figuring out in your mind what you ultimately want to accomplish, then looking back and seeing "what happened" to get you there. 1. Go out 6 months. You've hit your goal. What happened? 2. Go out 6 months. You didn't hit the goal, here's where you're at. What happened? • Most people operate from what their past experience has programmed them to believe is possible. • What's something you can clearly see that you want to create in the future? 1. Here's the trick - it's got to be the "right" thing - it must benefit not just you, but others too. 2. If it's making more money, you have to be clear on how that's going to help everyone else. • Put yourself in that new reality. 1. What do you notice, that you never have before? 2. Look back at the path from now to there. Look for the causes of that future reality.
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